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funkymonkymember
192 posts
Location: oxford


Posted:
anyone who hasn't seen everything ever made in the name of Family Guy... go kill yourself.... no wait... watch all the family series first... then do it.... no no wait wait... watch them, reply to this thread... THEN kill yourself... actully.. leave out the killing bit, just go watch them....

Quagmire speaking to Tricia Takanawa, Asain New reporter for Channel 5 News

"hu, i've never had a Spannish chick before, OH-LAY!!!"

Jelloambiguous
646 posts
Location: Mpls, MN, USA


Posted:
this isn't 100% right, but:

"Look over there!! A newly wed inter-racial gay couple burning the american flag!!!"

-Brian, from the witness protection episode.

and

"ITS GONNA RAIN!!!"

-The blackie weather report.

[ 05. October 2003, 08:18: Message edited by: Jello ]

_________________________________
Fuzzy Dice.......................................


funkymonkymember
192 posts
Location: oxford


Posted:
haha.. just remembering that one makes me laugh.. i was going to put the "ITS GOING TO RAIN" one in my first post, but i wasn't sure if people would remember it... classic....


Stewie: Isn't It Funny How They Say "Life Is Like A Box Of Chocolates"? Well In Your Case, Dear Mother, Life Is Like A Box Of ACTIVE GRENADES!!haha....haha.. i'mi sorry, carry o... i've got to get off the floor....

Jelloambiguous
646 posts
Location: Mpls, MN, USA


Posted:
"ITS GONNA RAIN!!!" is up there with the "OH YEAHH!!!!" courtroom entrance scene. Both amazing moments in television history

another:

"Of course it was made by a man Lois, its not like its a delicious home cooked thankgiving dinner."

ahh, crap, I need to brush on my family guy, can barely remember these, good thing I got seasons 1-3 on dvd:)

_________________________________
Fuzzy Dice.......................................


shadow steppinofficial hop irken
401 posts
Location: Tucson USA


Posted:
i like when he fights the dood in a chicken suit cause he gave him an expired coupon

In my hands I hold your smile and in my heart it runs so wild You are the one you are unique I'm so in love you make me weak And the reason that I feel is like a shadow from a light so if you have the chance to be with me be my shadow in the night


cKBRONZE Member
member
19 posts
Location: sydney, Australia


Posted:
ah family guy, undoubably sooo classy.

stewie: "What do you want?"
cult leader: "I want to get the hell outta here!"
stewie: "Oh i'm sorry, we're fresh out of that, all we have is GRUESOME DEATH!" *shoots*
(sorry if thats not exact, my other computer with all the family guy eps on it is currently broken)

And who could forget stewie Eulogy when they are burying Brians mother?
"And God said unto Abraham 'You must kill your firstborn son Isaac' and Abraham said 'I'm sorry I can't hear you, You'll have to speak into the microphone. And God Said 'Oh I'm sorry, Is this better? Testing Testing one, two, Jerry Pull out the high end, i'm still getting some hissback here"
Brian: "Say something about my mother!!"
Stewie: "oh.. right.. I never knew biscuit as a dog, but as a table she was very sturdy, all four legs the same length.."
Brian: "OK that's enough"
Stewie: "ok, Requim and Terra Pax, and so forth Amen"

(if you can't tell, i will dominate this thread if you give me the chance.. i have seen episodes sooo many times its just silly )

p.s. if anyone can tell me what Requim and terra pax actually means, that'd be grand.. i think it has something to do with returning them to the earth or such?

READ MY SIGNATURE

cK

You love the middle ages, Don't you?Sir, Yes Sir!!The concept of a Geocentric universe gets you sexually excited, Doesn't it?Sir, Yes Sir!!You want to make 16th century mathematician Johannes Kepler your bitch, Don't you?Sir, Yes Sir!!


Jelloambiguous
646 posts
Location: Mpls, MN, USA


Posted:
hahahahahaha, nice ones I'm am but a student of family guy, I would not be so bold as to claim to be its master, for family guy is wicked and its wrath horrid

_________________________________
Fuzzy Dice.......................................


SaBBaSenthusiast
215 posts
Location: Madrid, Spain


Posted:
i'm not sure what happened, there was something that had most of the earth population killed and they saw on tv how people were eating the chinese correspondant: -"aaah, they'll be hungry in an hour..."

Don't you destroy your enemy by making him your friend?? - Rev Bem (Magog), Andromeda


siliconslavemember
36 posts
Location: near guildford uk


Posted:
Lois: You should spend more time with our kids, Peter, and with me.
Peter: Uh, what could me and you do together?
[Lois giggles]
Peter: Lois! You've got a sick mind!
Lois: Peter, I'm talking about making love.
Peter: Oh! I thought you wanted us to murder the children and harvest their organs for beer money.

DarkDevilmember
233 posts
Location: St. John's, Newfoundland.


Posted:
Lois: Why is everyone staring at me?
Peter: Because your actions lastnight were so Foopah i had to call a university professor to find a word to describe it.
*Flashback to a university professor on a phone reading a dictionary*
Professor: Use *pause* Foopah.
Peter: Thanks Professor!

Ladies and gentlemen, this is not a trick, this is a stunt. The difference between a stunt and a trick is that a trick is something that tricks or fools the audience, a stunt is something that only an idiot would do -Ivan, Ash Circle, 10/04/03


FlamingMonkeymember
50 posts
Location: Colchester


Posted:
stewie to his bear:
"did you know gullible isn't in the dictionary?"
hands bear dictionary, bear reads:
"oh it isn't??"
stewie takes book back,

there's a bit more but i cant remember it.

Monkey see, Monkey do...


LuxBRONZE Member
member
71 posts
Location: Cornwall/ Brighton, England


Posted:
stewie: oh touche rupert touche! get me at my own game will you... *sighs* Im so alone....

(i think thats it)

DioHoP Mechanical Engineer
729 posts
Location: OK, USA


Posted:
At the baseball game a fly ball sails toward Stewie and a baby kid sitting next to him. Stewie catches it and the other baby looks on in awe. Stewie offers to trade the kid his baseball for the kid's little souvenir bat, takes the bat in exchange for the baseball, SMACKS THE KID UPSIDE THE HEAD WITH IT and knocks the ball out of the kid's hands and takes it back. "Now what did we learn?"

Peter: "Optimus Prime's Jewish?!"

Public Service Anouncement: "And remember, guns don't kill people, dangerous minorities do!"

How some of these episodes were allowed on the air puzzles me, but definitely a great show and incredibly funny no matter which episode you're watching.

What hits the fan is not evenly distributed.


trixyBRONZE Member
member
100 posts
Location: Milton Keynes and Kingston Upon Thames (UK)


Posted:
ok this is a bit like one already on here.

stewie:
"someone once said life is like a box of chocolates, you never know which one your gonna get.
your life however, mother, is like a box of HAND GRENADES YOU NEVER KNOW WHICH ONES GOING TO GO OFF NEXT"

lois:
"oh you want your toy back, here you go. now eat your greens."

stewie:
"why...i'll..."

stewie walks out of the room.
there is a small explosion.

i think thats right.

luv trixy

THAT'S ABOUT AS SENSIBLE AS STANDING ON A HILL, IN A THUNDER STORM, HOLDING A GOLF CLUB AND SHOUTING AT THE TOP OF YOUR VOICE /ALL GOD'S ARE *BASTADS* -THE GREAT TERRY PRATCHETT.


cKBRONZE Member
member
19 posts
Location: sydney, Australia


Posted:
hmm, i know everyone has this one kinda wrong, but i dont know the spelling of a few words. i'll try tho:

Rupert, Did you know the word gullible isn't in the dictionary?
*hands dictionary to bear*
Whats that? It isn't? Let me see that.
Oh Touche Rupert! Hoisted by my own Petard!
God i'm so alone

Everyone forgot the hoisted line and thats the funniest! (tho i dont think i have the spelling right for petard.)

Peter: "and, and What about that time you made me sit through your Uncle Jerry's Snuff film?"

*cut to a room of people watching a screen
Peter: "wait.. are they really going to kill that girl??" *

and Stewie hiding in the cheerleaders Locker room
"Oh shouldn't look, its not... Nice Ones Jenine!! oh and look at Liesel in all her curvaceous glory, Oh wait it appears my wee wee has been stricken by rigor mortis.."

You love the middle ages, Don't you?Sir, Yes Sir!!The concept of a Geocentric universe gets you sexually excited, Doesn't it?Sir, Yes Sir!!You want to make 16th century mathematician Johannes Kepler your bitch, Don't you?Sir, Yes Sir!!


...phobos...member
56 posts
Location: truro


Posted:
[Stewie and a toy frog]
S: Talk, damn you! Oh, I see...the strong silent type...well THIS SHOULD MAKE YOU TALK!
[Stewie comes out with a lady-pig stuffed animal]
s: Oh, oh- you like this dont you...watch me make sweet love to your wife...oh, oh god look at me. Im making love to a pig!


..I think thats it..

man, it makes you wanna shoot them in the face and beat them with baseball bats, doesnt it?


cKBRONZE Member
member
19 posts
Location: sydney, Australia


Posted:
Hehhe, love that one. For all ppl: its Kermit the frog he has tied to a pole torturing. and he starts going it with Miss Piggy

there is one more line tho

"Oh god, look at me, i'm making love to a pig..I've turned into my father!"


next quote:
*peter is in an all negro comedy club*
Comedian: "Y'all remember that Exxon Valdez thing? that wasn't how it happened, some brother just fell inna ocean!"
*Laughter*
Peter: "oh yeah, i remember that, and.. and all those Seals died... *blacks stare at him* It was all over the news... *stare* the channel 6 news with Danny Rather.. *stare* or maybe someone else was covering for him that night...*stare* Well.. guess its about time for me to hit the ole Dusty Trail..
*leaves via fire exit, Alarm goes off*
"Whoops, found the emergency exit!"

hope that one wasnt too long.. you really have to see that ep to get the full effect of all the people staring

[ 03. October 2003, 01:36: Message edited by: cK ]

You love the middle ages, Don't you?Sir, Yes Sir!!The concept of a Geocentric universe gets you sexually excited, Doesn't it?Sir, Yes Sir!!You want to make 16th century mathematician Johannes Kepler your bitch, Don't you?Sir, Yes Sir!!


Jelloambiguous
646 posts
Location: Mpls, MN, USA


Posted:
I forgot the episode or the exact dialog, but "Homocide, Life on Seseme Street" was hilarious

_________________________________
Fuzzy Dice.......................................


RixatrixBRONZE Member
paranoid of gov't conspiracies
217 posts
Location: USA


Posted:
Loise: "Peter why would they make you president?" (refering to pres. of the toy company)
Peter: "I dunno maybe it's because i can state all 50 states in a quarter of a second....Nerarpbh"

Brian: "do you want an ice cream? that will cheer you up, huh?"
(stewie shakes his head no)
Brian: "do you want a cookie? how about a cookie?"
(stewie shakes his head no again)
Brian: "do you want to take a poo in Miss(can't remeber her name but spinnoff of teletubbies or something) shoe?
(stewie shakes his head yes and they leave)

sorry if those were long and i can't remember the one name but i do like family guy also and i know a million more quotes but can't remember them all right now. i also love Futurama too anyone else? but alas i'm at a strict college right now where i can't watch t.v. ok well goodbye until later all!~

cKBRONZE Member
member
19 posts
Location: sydney, Australia


Posted:
(Mother Maggie was the lady from the teletubbies show watched that one yesterday)

futurama rocks too!!! love it

Zapp: "We got his most often used word from this dictionary listing Bender's most often used words:"
"Number 10: Chump
Number 9:Chumpette
Number 8:Yours
Number 7:Up
Number 6:Pimpmobile
Number 5:Bite
Number 4:My
Number 3:Shiny
Number 2:Daffodil
and Bender's number One most frequently uttered word ,the word which, if uttered will blow up this entire planet: Ass!"
Fry: " aargh, We don't have long!!"

You love the middle ages, Don't you?Sir, Yes Sir!!The concept of a Geocentric universe gets you sexually excited, Doesn't it?Sir, Yes Sir!!You want to make 16th century mathematician Johannes Kepler your bitch, Don't you?Sir, Yes Sir!!


RixatrixBRONZE Member
paranoid of gov't conspiracies
217 posts
Location: USA


Posted:
yeah mother maggie! thanks! and i saw that futurama too they're both great shows!~


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