Forums > Social Chat > most honest pick up line ever

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Konstilovable smart-ass
785 posts
Location: vineyards, Vienna, Austria


Posted:
"Listen, I'm not very good at this. But the good news is that I'm too drunk to have sex with you anyway. So I guess what I'm hoping for here is an hour or so of good conversation, followed by you and I going back to my apartment to slow dance to Bad English's 'When I See You Smile' before falling asleep. Then we'll wake up, go to the diner by my place, and have some eggs. Then sometime next week we'll get together again, I'll get you nice and drunk, and I will basically attack you with my sexual organs."

-jason mulgrew



www.jasonmulgrew.com ubblol

"is optimism in austria just a lack of information?"
-Alfred Dorfer


LyraSILVER Member
spiny norman
314 posts
Location: Cincinnati,damn it, USA


Posted:
I heard a better one--

"What does a 300 pound polar bear do?Breaks the ice, hi I'm {insert name here}"

lyra

if you think that our kiss was all in the lips, come on you got it all wrong man, and if you think that our dance was all in the hips then, oh well, do the twist -The White Stripes


LadayBRONZE Member
member
75 posts
Location: In UK for now, but born an lived in ZIMBABWE and S...


Posted:
He he! I've had... ur eyes really match wat ur wearing. ...... I was wearing white trousers and a pink top,,,,and my eyes are green!! How? Ha ha1

squarexbearSILVER Member
....of doom!
585 posts
Location: Hastings, UK


Posted:
lol...a very drunken friend came out with the best one...

'can i have your number so i can phone you and apologise in the morning?'

DragonFuryBRONZE Member
Draco Iracundia
784 posts
Location: Adelaide, Australia


Posted:
"hi, can i talk to you? i'm from darwin and dont know anyone"

worked pretty well biggrin

Do we sleep when we die?


TinklePantsGOLD Member
Clique Infiltrator, Cunning Linguist and Master Debator
4,219 posts
Location: Edinburgh burgh burrrrrr, United Kingdom


Posted:
I don't use pick up lines, I just bat my eyes and get flooded with offers. Then my boyfriend turns up and they all disappear. He's always ruining my fun!

Always use "so's your face" and "only on Tuesdays" in as many conversations possible


MynciBRONZE Member
Macaque of all trades
8,738 posts
Location: wombling free..., United Kingdom


Posted:
"have you got a boyfriend" worked surprisingly well
as did
"sex or pizza?"

A couple of balls short of a full cascade... or maybe a few cards short of a deck... we'll see how this all fans out.


pineapple peteSILVER Member
water based
5,125 posts
Location: melbourne, Australia


Posted:
Post deleted by pineapple pete

"you know there are no trophys for doing silly things in real life yeah pete?" said ant "you wont get a 'listened to ride of the valkyries all the way to vietnam' trophy"

*proud owner of the very cute fire_spinning_angel, birgit and neon shaolin*


taintedaddict
422 posts
Location: London


Posted:
Let's go to my place and do the things I'll tell everyone we did anyway.

So... How am I doin'?

Get your coat love, you've pulled.

Put your crash helmet on, you're going through the head board.

Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?

I'm easy. Are you?

I may not be the best looking man in here, but I'm the only one talking to you

There are no stupid questions, only stupid answers...


doctor_fandangoGOLD Member
co-director of A.C.B.I.S.H.A.
761 posts
Location: in the corner beside the filing cabinets, 2nd floo...


Posted:
"bond, james bond"

There's no place like 127.0.0.1, There's no place like 127.0.0.1, There's no place like 127.0.0.1,

"in most of our friends we're the hippies. but we have hippie friends of our own.. its like a dog having its own pet" - H. Sinoquet 19-03-2005


TinklePantsGOLD Member
Clique Infiltrator, Cunning Linguist and Master Debator
4,219 posts
Location: Edinburgh burgh burrrrrr, United Kingdom


Posted:
Written by: doctor_fandango


"bond, james bond"




you just saying that or did you actually use the line? ubblol still funny whichever!

Always use "so's your face" and "only on Tuesdays" in as many conversations possible


doctor_fandangoGOLD Member
co-director of A.C.B.I.S.H.A.
761 posts
Location: in the corner beside the filing cabinets, 2nd floo...


Posted:
i have never used a line. but i realy appreciate the good ones

There's no place like 127.0.0.1, There's no place like 127.0.0.1, There's no place like 127.0.0.1,

"in most of our friends we're the hippies. but we have hippie friends of our own.. its like a dog having its own pet" - H. Sinoquet 19-03-2005


My hairs on fireIf its got pistons or boobs, its gonna be expensive...
515 posts
Location: Cyprus


Posted:
''My name is borat like barry they call me schteeeve, would like to make e de boom boom with me soon?''

Henry Hill - 'One day the kids from the neighbourhood carried my mothers groceries all the way home, you know why? It was out of respect'...

ahmet_20valve_ahmet(at)hotmail(dot)com
Hope all is well : )


Mint SauceBRONZE Member
veteran
1,453 posts
Location: Lancs England


Posted:
"humm its raining do you want to shair my umbrela"

before i met those lot i thought they'd be a bunch of dreadlocked hippies that smoked, set things on fire ,and drank a lot of tea but then when i met them....oh wait (PyroWill)


SNOOPoiCarpal \'Tunnel
3,380 posts
Location: At the bottom of the garden with the fairies...


Posted:
a mate of mine n lauz's was trying to chat this guy up from Derby. her chat up line was:

"Do you shag sheep?"

ubblol

THWACK!!!!
Liz_Ard: Ouch!
SNOOPoi: Thats just not the sound of someone doing it right!


Xopher (aka Mr. Clean)enthusiast
456 posts
Location: Hoboken, New Jersey, USA


Posted:
Why on Earth would anyone (perp or vic) want HONESTY in a pick-up line? If a pick-up line will work on you at all, it gets points for creativity, not truth.

"If you didn't like something the first time, the cud won't be any good either." --Elsie the Cow, Ruminations


doctor_fandangoGOLD Member
co-director of A.C.B.I.S.H.A.
761 posts
Location: in the corner beside the filing cabinets, 2nd floo...


Posted:
Thats true, but bare in mind that most pick up lines are so cheesy and usualy the same drivel. that being honest is actually creative too...

There's no place like 127.0.0.1, There's no place like 127.0.0.1, There's no place like 127.0.0.1,

"in most of our friends we're the hippies. but we have hippie friends of our own.. its like a dog having its own pet" - H. Sinoquet 19-03-2005


My hairs on fireIf its got pistons or boobs, its gonna be expensive...
515 posts
Location: Cyprus


Posted:
...''hey there, fancy a drink?''

Henry Hill - 'One day the kids from the neighbourhood carried my mothers groceries all the way home, you know why? It was out of respect'...

ahmet_20valve_ahmet(at)hotmail(dot)com
Hope all is well : )


GelflingBRONZE Member
Watcher of 80s cartoons
665 posts
Location: Chepstow & Bristol, United Kingdom


Posted:
I'm a necrophiliac - how are you at playing dead?

I once got so drunk and actually said to a girl "so then you want to have sex with me" The funny thing is we ended up having a three year relationship that started that night.

>What do you think about the state of the Earth?
>I'm optimistic.
>So why do you look so sad?
>I'm not sure that my optimism is justified.


courts1979BRONZE Member
Rainbow Brite
169 posts
Location: Newtown, Sydney, Australia


Posted:
"look hunny .......i cant just sit here and look at u wiggle ur arse, when u coming home with me?"

" Look mate ........i'm here till the music stops...... oh yeh nice to meet u"

CX

Lifes too short, dance nakked & wiggle ur arse!!


MynciBRONZE Member
Macaque of all trades
8,738 posts
Location: wombling free..., United Kingdom


Posted:
"Yes your ex just went off to shag mine, Shall we..."

A couple of balls short of a full cascade... or maybe a few cards short of a deck... we'll see how this all fans out.


TinklePantsGOLD Member
Clique Infiltrator, Cunning Linguist and Master Debator
4,219 posts
Location: Edinburgh burgh burrrrrr, United Kingdom


Posted:
what do you like best - Daddy or Chips?

Always use "so's your face" and "only on Tuesdays" in as many conversations possible


Deviant_thinkingmember
36 posts
Location: Edenderry, Co. Offaly


Posted:
This is originally from a book called

"the orange mocha chip frapachino years" :

NB (requires the lovely lady to ask for a light for her cigarette)

*insert whatever way she asks for a light*
eg

"got a light?"


*put your penis in her hand then say...*
"I don't have a match but how does this strike you?"

now one of my bro's, a friend and I have tried this. I'll let you know if anyone is ever successful with this bad-boy or wether it's destined for the junk-heap. there's been no luck as of yet (can't get my head around why ubblol )
(off topic, I am completely noob to this site, but I do happen to know a few ppl who have been posting here for a while, so please be nice, or I'll get Fabergé to kick your ass. and in case your wondering, yes she shall kill me for mentioning her name in a post with a chat up line as dodgy as this !)

Give a man a fire and he's warm for the night,
Set a man on fire and he's warm for the rest of his life.


fluffy napalm fairyCarpal \'Tunnel
3,638 posts
Location: Brum / Dorset / Fairy Land


Posted:
Konsti that is genius biggrin ubblol - thanks dude biggrin

Geologists do it in the dirt................ spank


KyrianDreamer
4,308 posts
Location: York, England


Posted:
'Excuse me, see I have this friend who needs to take photos of people kissing for her art piece......'

Oh come on, it had to be said, roarfire thats the most genius thing ever!

Keep your dream alive
Dreamin is still how the strong survive

Shalom VeAhavah

New Hampshire has a point....


faith enfireBRONZE Member
wandering thru the woods of WI
3,556 posts
Location: Wisconsin, USA


Posted:
my ex used this one not on me-he was smarter than that

"you dropped your smile"
they look down, and then get it and smile
"oh there it is"

supposedly this works well, i told him he'd be flipped off as i walked away

Faith
Nay, whatever comes one hour was sunlit and the most high gods may not make boast of any better thing than to have watched that hour as it passed


crowley2BRONZE Member
official hop cutie
272 posts
Location: Uk, Essex, Clacton


Posted:
how you doing

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it. ~ Terry pratchett


Mr MajestikSILVER Member
coming to a country near you
4,696 posts
Location: home of the tiney toothy bear, Australia


Posted:
"first one to the bushes gets to be on top!"

"but have you considered there is more to life than your eyelids?"

jointly owned by Fire_Spinning_Angel and Blu_Valley


Rouge DragonBRONZE Member
Insert Champagne Here
13,215 posts
Location: without class distinction, Australia


Posted:
best pick up line used on me was "i'm not hitting on you...but what if i was?"

However I suppose i can forgive him; he was romanian and therefore english was his second language

i would have changed ***** to phallus, and claire to petey Petey

Rougie: but that's what I'm doing here
Arnwyn: what letting me adjust myself in your room?..don't you dare quote that on HoP...


BrennPLATINUM Member
Will carpal your tunnel in a minute.
3,286 posts
Location: Melbourne, Australia


Posted:
"I spin fire. Topless." ubblol

ॐ

Owner of burningoftheclavey smile
Owned by Lost83spy


jaeroSILVER Member
your new best enemy
246 posts
Location: over the river, through the woods, USA


Posted:
"so... have you heard any good pick-up lines lately?"
works every time...
also, this one worked once.
"I'm bored, you want to get drunk and f*ck?"
later that night, I assumed she was a slut.

I'll get there too late if I shorten my stride, I'll get there too soon if I find me a ride, I'll never move forward if I try to hide this path that I've troden one step at a time.


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