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MikeGinnyGOLD Member
HOP Mad Doctor
13,925 posts
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA


Posted:
I am a firm believer that if you are going to complain, offer an alternative.

With that in mind, this is the speech I would have given if I were President. This speech would have been broadcast within 24 hours of word of the prisoner tortures reaching my desk:

"My Fellow Americans, Citizens of Iraq, and People of the World:

"I have recently been made aware of the heinous abuses that have been perpetrated against prisoners under our guard in Iraq. I have been shocked and appalled by the information I have receieved.

"On behalf of all Americans, the U.S. Armed Forces, and especially those who perpretrated these horrific crimes, I offer my most sincere and humble apologies to all who have been affected, both directly and indirectly.

"Please rest assured that there will be a prompt and thorough investigation into these ghastly crimes. All individuals responsible will be apprehended, tried, and brought to swift and decisive justice.

"The United States has a proud history of treating our Prisoners of War with decency and humanity. We have strict policies regarding compliance with both the guidelines laid out in the Geneva Convention and with our own internal standards. These atrocities do not reflect the values of our people our our military.

"The torture of these prisoners has cast shame over our Armed Forces, and indeed over our entire nation. Furthermore, these events have poisoned our good will with the people of Iraq and with the people of the World and, as President, I will not stand for it.

"Thank you, and may God bless and watch over America, Iraq, and especially those who have been affected by these events."

-Mike

Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella



A buckuht n a hooze! -Valura


robotfacemember
190 posts

Posted:
Also, sometimes there is great importance in argueing semantics. It's a fallacy that it is meaningless.

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