Page: ......
_Clare_BRONZE Member
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)


Posted:
Hello everyone...

Oks, well, I've had some bad news and thought I would post on here for advice on alternative therapies.

I've had a look through the existing threads (nice search system Malcolm!!) but didn't find what I was looking for, so I hope this is ok.


So then...

Just over a month ago my mother turned yellow.
It was two days before my parents were due to go on holiday, and instead she ended up in hospital.

They discovered it was a blockage near her bile duct, and after sticking a camera down her throat, found out she had a tumour on her pancreas.

She was eventually sent home for a few weeks to recuperate, then brought back in for an operation last Friday.

We discovered then that the tumour on her pancreas is too big - 6 cms - to operate on, and parts of it have spread to nearby glands.

The prognosis isn't good. They've told her between 6 months and a year, but any reseach I've done shows people with pancreatic cancer lasting between 4 - 6 months.

Our family is coping well, considering, so far.

(Personally, I feel like I'm constantly going to cry.
I try not to think about her leaving us as much as possible. My mother is the strongest person in the world... She is kind and lovely and despite having pissed me off often, has done a splendid job and has had a splendid life (she's travelled all over the place - took a boat to Australia from Ireland 40 years ago to work as a nanny on a cattle ranch!! She came home, by boat, via NZ, Fiji and the Panama Canal - in a time when tourism wasn't Lonely Planet travel-by-numbers).

At the minute, I'm coping. I'm finding myself running about my parent's house 'doing stuff' for them while also trying to keep a performance business afloat. That's been a barrel of laughs in itself... anyone setting up a business in the arts - prepare yourself now for the bitchiness, competition, jealousy and lack of support.

My deepest apologies to m'lovely friends on here if I haven't responded to your PMs or calls recently - thanks BamBam and Fluff x).

Jesus... that was a bitter and twisted rant... humblest apologies for that... redface

Anyways... I have posted this for a reason rolleyes smile

The doctors are still deciding whether mum should have chemo.
None of us are very happy with that idea... don't want her last few months to be spent throwing up.

She's got a very strong Christian faith, which keeps her bouncing through each day (lol, and she keeps emotionally blackmailing me to convert!!! Lol... I've told her it won't happen, but thanks anyway smile )

But I want info on alternative therapies... things that might reduce it, or just prolong her life for a bit. Does anyone here have any advice on where I could look?

I know not to accept intershnet advice as gospel, but it's good to get a guideline - or a point in the right direction.

Electro-magnetic therapy? Acupuncture? Organic foods and no tap water?!!

Does anyone here have any helpful hints?

Thanks so much for your time... and go home tonight and give your parents a hug... they could be gone much sooner than you think.

Love and hugs to you alll
Clare xx

Getting to the other side smile


_Clare_BRONZE Member
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)


Posted:
Lol... bizarre double posting...



smile
EDITED_BY: _Clare_ (1178214257)

Getting to the other side smile


darkness-beforeGOLD Member
Rock is dead, long live paper and scissors
197 posts
Location: The sea, United Kingdom


Posted:
Just read some of this thread, really amazing how so many of you have come together to actually be nice to each other on this one thing that affects somebody else!

Gran died of cancer over a year ago now but clares mum perking up has put a smile on my face. You guys are all awesome for the positive feeling going on in this thread. Good luck clare and clares mum. smile

Eagles may soar but weasles don't get sucked into jet engines.

Telepath wanted, you know where to apply.


_Clare_BRONZE Member
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)


Posted:
smile

That's HoP for you...

Fire spinners are usually lovely people, which is good smile

hug

Getting to the other side smile


mechBRONZE Member
Carpal \'Tunnel
6,207 posts
Location: "In your ear", United Kingdom


Posted:
 Written by: _Clare_


smile

That's HoP for you...

Fire spinners are usually lovely people, which is good smile

hug



if anyone else says that about me, im going to have to go balance it all out by kicking some small fluffie animals!

wink

Step (el-nombrie)


GnorBRONZE Member
Carpal \'Tunnel
5,814 posts
Location: Perth, Australia


Posted:
 Written by: mech


 Written by: _Clare_


smile

That's HoP for you...

Fire spinners are usually lovely people, which is good smile

hug



if anyone else says that about me, im going to have to go balance it all out by kicking some small fluffie animals!

wink



thats what the usually covers.... wink kiss kiss

Is it the Truth?
Is it Fair to all concerned?
Will it build Goodwill and Better Friendships?
Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?

Im in a lonely battle with the world with a fish to match the chip on my shoulder. Gnu in Binnu in a cnu


mechBRONZE Member
Carpal \'Tunnel
6,207 posts
Location: "In your ear", United Kingdom


Posted:

Non-Https Image Link


look with this i get a two for one

i get to kick a fluffy rabbit, and a small child!

how good is that wink

Step (el-nombrie)


GnorBRONZE Member
Carpal \'Tunnel
5,814 posts
Location: Perth, Australia


Posted:
then you can eat the flowers or use them to beat the fluffy thing first

Is it the Truth?
Is it Fair to all concerned?
Will it build Goodwill and Better Friendships?
Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?

Im in a lonely battle with the world with a fish to match the chip on my shoulder. Gnu in Binnu in a cnu


_Clare_BRONZE Member
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)


Posted:
ubblol ubblol

Mech... you are so funny...

A bit like this:


Non-Https Image Link

Getting to the other side smile


Mr MajestikSILVER Member
coming to a country near you
4,696 posts
Location: home of the tiney toothy bear, Australia


Posted:
thats somewhat disturbing!

"but have you considered there is more to life than your eyelids?"

jointly owned by Fire_Spinning_Angel and Blu_Valley


mechBRONZE Member
Carpal \'Tunnel
6,207 posts
Location: "In your ear", United Kingdom


Posted:
 Written by: _Clare_


ubblol ubblol

Mech... you are so funny...

A bit like this:


Non-Https Image Link




no clare, my pic was sweet and nice,

your rabbit is saying

"watch what happens when the easter egg eats you instead!.....MHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!"

Step (el-nombrie)


_Clare_BRONZE Member
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)


Posted:
Yep...

It reminded me of you... the ability to be sweet and lovely... but with hints of a mildly sinister side smile

tongue

hug

Getting to the other side smile


mechBRONZE Member
Carpal \'Tunnel
6,207 posts
Location: "In your ear", United Kingdom


Posted:
 Written by: _Clare_


Yep...

It reminded me of you... the ability to be sweet and lovely... but with hints of a mildly sinister side smile

tongue

hug



ok, so i get that, i get teh sweet and nice, with a hint of ill ghost you if you cant see both my hands

but when

WHEN

have you seen me using a small girl in a blue dress as a fashion accessory?

Step (el-nombrie)


_Clare_BRONZE Member
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)


Posted:
Hahahahahhahahah....

ubblol

Thanks... needed that

smile

x

Getting to the other side smile


mechBRONZE Member
Carpal \'Tunnel
6,207 posts
Location: "In your ear", United Kingdom


Posted:
no no no i really want to know, i thought i was uber careful when i had that shot taken, where teh hell where you wink

Step (el-nombrie)


_Clare_BRONZE Member
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)


Posted:
Hahahahahha... this is so wrong on so many levels...

Righto... am off to see some of this:

www.foolsfestival.com

(Best street performer festie in Ireland smile )

Getting to the other side smile


Mr MajestikSILVER Member
coming to a country near you
4,696 posts
Location: home of the tiney toothy bear, Australia


Posted:
ZOMG, you MUST see mario queen of the circus!!!! he is BRILLIANT!!!!!!!! and a really nice guy as well.

"but have you considered there is more to life than your eyelids?"

jointly owned by Fire_Spinning_Angel and Blu_Valley


mechBRONZE Member
Carpal \'Tunnel
6,207 posts
Location: "In your ear", United Kingdom


Posted:
ok

so i was looking over the site link clare posted, and was thinking, wow this is really cool... and then i cam across this....


Non-Https Image Link


what kind of nice festival, has to keep its children safe from having poo rubbed around their mouths?

ubblol

Step (el-nombrie)


_Clare_BRONZE Member
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)


Posted:
smile

Yeah... not sure what a Child Safe wristband will achieve... but hey shrug smile

Saw Mario last year at the festival too... he is awesome smile

But I'm late.. and missing stuff!

Btw... mum's still in hospital, they haven't given her the third blood yet... should be sometime this afternoon.

smile
x

Getting to the other side smile


georgemcBRONZE Member
Sitting down facing forward . . .
2,387 posts
Location: Christchurch, New Zealand


Posted:
Clare/Mech, that rabbit is just evil....

Oh, and the child safe wrist band thing - I think it's probably something different - it's to keep YOU safe from the kids - probably made of celery or broccoli or something similar to repel the kids away from you??? Everyone needs saving from little miss cutesy's like that one!

Clare hope the transfusion goes fine. Now I am going to write up my lessons learnt from the weekend. Have a good rest of the weekend for everyone over the other side of the world (you are soooo behind the times! I was going to say "so last century" as the saying goes but that's a bit much of an exageration).
George

Written by: Doc Lightning talking about Marmite in Kichi's Intro thread

I have several large jars of the stuff. I actually like it... a little. And don't tell anyone I admitted to it.
grin


_Clare_BRONZE Member
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)


Posted:
Le sigh.

Righto...

So mum is doing very well since the transfusion... she's looking much more awake and upbeat... there's colour in her cheeks and she seems quite happy smile

There's more graphic details I could give you about her health... but yeuwww, you don't really want to know smile

We went on a family mission to the Mourne mountains yesterday - drove into the mountains and had some tea and biscuits by Spelga Dam. She was very happy I went too. Which was nice.

She's being really nice to me recently, telling me lots of lovely things, which she's never said to me before. It's all very good to hear and makes me happy...

But then I realise that she's telling me these things because a) she's dying and she wants me to know. B) she knows I'm a bit down at the minute and she's trying to cheer me up...

I suppose I should listen to what she says without over-examining it... but then, apparently I think too much at the best of times rolleyes

Ok then, so since I'm feeling uncomfortable/guilty/mildly pathetic about using this thread as a personal rant... I'm going to break thoughts into points...

* Finding it hard to trust mum's current good health... kindof like being in limbo, with a looming dark cloud, waiting for the phonecall that says she's back in hospital. So, am enjoying it while it lasts, but it's uneasy... not peaceful.

* Still feeling down. Finding it hard to trust anybody or anything, as nothing can be relied on. Can't even rely on my own emotions... The only thing I know, for sure, is that I am on a rollercoaster that's going too fast.

* Am avoiding some people because I don't want to answer questions. Am contacting other's too much in some kindof bid to establish stability. Both situations make me feel guilty for not being stronger and letting people down.

* Am starting to get quite angry with people. It's a mix of frustration and paranoid insecurity, panic and exhaustion.

* Feeling guilty about the constant excuses for my behaviour. For not being stronger and wondering if my mind is actually falling apart. I spend time wondering how this will affect me in the future. Since I'm going through this alone, will I allow anyone to provide me with any kind of support in the future?

(With respect, please don't tell me that I'm strong, or that I don't have to apologise or feel guilty. I know many of you think that and the sentiment is appreciated. And I know occasionally, it's true.... but it makes me feel worse that for most of the time (nearly all the time), I don't believe that in myself)


Anyways... in other news...

I've also noticed that every single person I've spoken to recently is going through a difficult time. Relationships are splitting up, people are going through difficult times, people are feeling sad frown

I asked a friend who is into energy work about this... he said there is alot of very strong energy around at the minute... but not to look at it as negative... instead, it's changing. Which I suppose is true...

Take care
xx

Getting to the other side smile


Neon_ShaolinGOLD Member
hehe, 'Member' huhuh
6,120 posts
Location: Behind you. With Jam


Posted:
frown



wave



hug hug

"I used to want to change the world, now I just wanna leave the room with a little dignity..." - Lotus Weinstock


_Clare_BRONZE Member
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)


Posted:
wave

smile

hug

Getting to the other side smile


georgemcBRONZE Member
Sitting down facing forward . . .
2,387 posts
Location: Christchurch, New Zealand


Posted:
Must be kinda like a truce in the fighting during a war - nice while it lasts but you know the bullets and bombs will be flying again soon...
(well, sorry about that comaparison, but it measn something to me anyway!)

Keep touching your nose girl.
hug hug hug

Written by: Doc Lightning talking about Marmite in Kichi's Intro thread

I have several large jars of the stuff. I actually like it... a little. And don't tell anyone I admitted to it.
grin


GnorBRONZE Member
Carpal \'Tunnel
5,814 posts
Location: Perth, Australia


Posted:
Kids around me are going off at the minute.

Adults are seesawing and cranky.

Energy does strange things though shrug

Is it the Truth?
Is it Fair to all concerned?
Will it build Goodwill and Better Friendships?
Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?

Im in a lonely battle with the world with a fish to match the chip on my shoulder. Gnu in Binnu in a cnu


mechBRONZE Member
Carpal \'Tunnel
6,207 posts
Location: "In your ear", United Kingdom


Posted:
your roller coaster will stop at some point honey, and you will be able to get off, i know at the moment you are feeling down,and there is little anyone an say to ease your mind.

you cant see the woods for the trees, and its hard, its dark and it is lonely, all the periods in our lives that we face, that are truly harrowing, are lonely times.

take comfort in your mums words, she says them because she loves you, not because she has to, but because she needs to tell you them, before she passes,so that she knows that she wont regret anything, and that you know you are loved.

no matter what happens, nor how your life will change, remember the love she has for you, and while it is easier to remember the bad times, try and hold on in your heart to the good times, like the mazing holidays you had, or the day you went out somewhere and you all laughed.

know you are loved, and even if you don't think you are strong now, the strength is in you, and one day it will come back to you.

faith, not in anything else but you and the love you hold.
its hard honey, you must feel so low, and with so little energy, yet you still fight, im so impressed.

i don't know what you are feeling, all i know is that it must be hard, and it must be hard for you mum to see the hurt and the pain. but you both need to see it.

its times like this you find out who really cares for you, and who is just fare weather friend.

now, go buy a large bar of chocolate, or a new cd, or something to make you feel better, and try to spend 5 mins a day outside of your body.

relax and chill...

hug

laterdays step

Step (el-nombrie)


_Clare_BRONZE Member
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)


Posted:
hug2

Step... you rock.

Thank you so much for your lovely words... you know just the right thing to say smile

Am sending love and hugs... and hope to see you soon hug

Take care mister
xxx

Getting to the other side smile


mechBRONZE Member
Carpal \'Tunnel
6,207 posts
Location: "In your ear", United Kingdom


Posted:
 Written by: _Clare_


hug2

Step... you rock.

Thank you so much for your lovely words... you know just the right thing to say smile

Am sending love and hugs... and hope to see you soon hug

Take care mister
xxx



right, next time i see you, im showing you my willie

and that should correct the cosmic balance wink

(you are welcome, i wish i was able to say them to your face, i wish i was able to take some of the pain for you, i wish i was able to let you sleep well at night, i wish i was able to make you feel warm and safe again, i wish lots of things for you honey

however what i cant wish for is what i think you wish for most, and for that im sorry)

Step (el-nombrie)


Neon_ShaolinGOLD Member
hehe, 'Member' huhuh
6,120 posts
Location: Behind you. With Jam


Posted:
nana #Step's a lovely sweetheart! Step's a lovely sweetheart!# nana

You've been found out! ubbloco

Having images of you balancing the cosmos on your willy now Step...

I should do a painting... smile

"I used to want to change the world, now I just wanna leave the room with a little dignity..." - Lotus Weinstock


_Clare_BRONZE Member
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)


Posted:
(Dave spank rolleyes)



Step...



Hahahha...



Don't be so scared about being lovely... if more guys had the courage to look into their souls and speak from the heart, the world would be a lovelier place biggrin



tongue



Thank you...



xx
EDITED_BY: _Clare_ (1178795847)

Getting to the other side smile


mechBRONZE Member
Carpal \'Tunnel
6,207 posts
Location: "In your ear", United Kingdom


Posted:
 Written by: _Clare_


(Dave spank rolleyes)

Step...

Hahahha...

Don't be so scared about being lovely... if more guys had the courage to look into their souls and speak from the heart, the world would be a lovelier place biggrin

tongue

Thank you...

xx



no the world would be full of men who where scared to have sex, and so teh human race would DIE!
wink

Step (el-nombrie)


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