Corrupt a Wish

You win the $20,000,00 powerball. And everyone finds out. Suddenly you have a whole lot of friends and family that you never new you had. And then you realise that they all just want you for you money, and you life becomes shallow and people just use you for you money and you find no happyness, untill one day you decide to give all of your money away, and life as a hurmet, and altho you have found ture happness you are as poor as a bum.

I wish I stop working and just dance.

wish granted... and it is fantastic... until you fall off a stage one day and break your leg so badly it never heals properly and you can never dance again

I wish i didnt work in fast food

You don't work in fast food. You work in the asbestos mines and die horribly coughing up your terminally irritated lungs.

I wish my youngest offspring would get her act together

Which she does, unfortunately she uses her new-found organisation skills to engineer a military takeover of the planet, at which point she violently removes everyone from their marmite and she spends each night sleeping on a massive mountain of stolen marmite jars!

I wish I was out in the sunshine...

because you live in huddersfield i don't need to corrupt your wish , you never get any sunshine so must stay indoors for the rest of your life

i wish i was in the pub drinking pear cider

you end up in a pub drinking pear cider. Unforutnily the massive, and not very friendly guy next to you thinks its -his- pear cider. A massive bar brawl follows the pub burns down, and all of the pubs in the area ban you from their bar, cos your -that- guy that burned down the pub.

I wish I could afford all the stuff i want for my dancing costume.

you find enough cash to get all the stuff for your dancing costume .... but you get that much stuff that you cannot move in it , are unable to dance and die of sadness

i wish getting my back tattooed was not painful

You suffer a major neck injury and you'll never move again but on the plus side your back tatoo is painless.

I wish for stupid to happen.

stupid happens. you get knocked around the head with it.

I wish my boss would stop giving me all the earlys shifts and give some to my boyfriend!

your boss gives your boyfriend the early shift... in fact, he gives your boyfriend ALL the shifts and you never work or see your boyfriend ever again (but hey, he got the early shift)

I wish i didnt have a 50th to attend the weekend of the 24th of Aug

You can't go cos you are in prison being tortured horribly to extract information about a crime you know nothing about.

I wish this winter wasn't so chilly.

global warming suddenly catches up with the planet, melting the icecaps and submerging the entire planet under water as temperaturtes rise. But at least its good weather for sailing!

I wish I could live for a thousand years

and you do! unfortunatly when you hit 80 (which is when you were meant to die) you go into a vegetative type state, in which you cannot move, eat or enjoy any enjoyable activities... but you are alive!

I wish i didnt have to go to work today

You've been fired so it's no longer a problem.

I wish smoking was good for your health.

smoking suddenly becomes good for you ... unfortunately everybody starts smoking and the worlds supply of tobacco runs out , everyone gets really angry from the come down and world war three starts

i wish i knew all the answers

You know all the answers. They are all 42
I wish I wasn't so fat!

you're not so fat ....you're now morbidly obese and can't do anything for yourself

i wish i could have everything i wanted

you get all that you wanted which was a single walkie talkie, a jar of mayonaise, and 2 C-sized batteries


I wish....I was driving to Burning Man RIGHT NOW

granted, you drive to a burning man and catch fire yourself.

I wish I could weave

You can now weave. When you get a chance make me a nice basket or sumthin'.

I wish for the 3 clowns riding small unicycles whilst blowing up balloon animals to haunt Poje's dreams