Corrupt a Wish

You have plenty of expendable income (as in you have it left after tax) but it's expendable (as in not necessary) cos what you really need is lurve, baby.

I wish my uni assignments completed themselves perfectly and on time.

compleated, perfectly, on time and the dog actually did eat it.

I wish that I had used the "my dog ate my homework" exscuse when I was in school.

You used it. Unfortunatly your teacher find out that you don't have a dog and puts you in the chokey for lieing to her.


I wish i had a chokey.

You ahve a chokey but it's a literal minded sort of beast and chokes you to death after which homework is the least of your worries.

I wish there were fairies in the bottom of my garden

a random passer by walks past your house, sees a group of fairies, gives 3 of them to medical science and sells the rest for a bazillion dollars to an angry norwiegan guy called erik who expliots them visciously eventually they all die and are wiped out and it wouldnt have happened if you would have discovered the fairies first (too bad there isnt any more so you could wish them back again)

i wish i had a respectable job

You become a Pole Dancer...Because the times...they are a changing : )

I wish i didnt have to get ANOTHER filling in my tooth....*Grumbles...Stupid teeth.

you dont, all your teeth fall out leaving you with a nice pink set of gums (they do bring out your eyes tho )

i wish i get good grades for my a levels on thursday

you get them, really good ones, but you are over qualified for the job you want and end up doing a really boring job that doesn't pay well but needs good grades to get.

i wish it was all really cool.

It is all really cool. It's frigging freezing in fact and no one can do anything creative or interesting cos they are too busy burning the last twigs of the last trees in the whole universe to ward off the imminent doom of a new ice age.

I wish my boss was away forever

He is and the company goes under and you l;ose your job

I wish for peace and happiness

You end up getting a piece of a Penis instead...Yuck

I wish for tighter dreadlocks

Your dreadlocks get tighter and tighter till the pressure on your head implodes your brain and goodey grey stuff comes out your ears.
I wish someone would make me a coffee

Using my awesome valmorification machine and a cunning trick of linguistics, I turn you into a cup of coffee, and then drink you. mmmmm.. hazelnutty. Now all that's left is to enjoy my digestive system.

I wish I had a pocket-full-o-dreams

You get yer pock o' dreams and it's so chock full that when you add another one, it explodes and gets gross, gooey dream juice all over you.



I wish brian would come back.

Brian comes back but it's Brian Jones the long dead member of the Rolling Stones and you get such a fright you slip in the gooey dream juice and get a nasty big bump on your head.

I wish they still made good old movies like Fred Astaire's

They start making good old movies again but the lack of special effects causes them to flop at the box office.

I wish for the re-runs of The Magic Roundabout to come back onto TV.

They come back, and you sit down to watch them, but someone pulls an amilie on you and keeps disconecting ur antenna at the good bits, causing you to jump up and down like a monkey.

I wish i could go back in time...

You go back in time and space to the presice spot where the black death was first contracted by a human.

I wish for 3 more wishes

You get three wishes, but wishes actually become fishes, according to the old saying, and it takes ages to get the smell out of the carpet.

I wish I had a plan.

you have a plan, and yer a man, Panama



I wish someone get's that.