Corrupt a Wish

You get your baby elephant... but soon the mother of said baby elephant comes looking for her child. She jumps into the sky and lands on you. Ewwwwwww.

I wish for an anti-elephant helmet. To protect me from falling elephants (but not rhinoceroses... you need a completely different hat for that).

Did you know elephants can't jump?

you get a non jumping elephant, which sky dives and lands right on top of you.

i wish i had a sky diving dolphin.

You get a sky diving dolphin but he won't stop yodelling, and refuses to sky dive.

I wish yodelling came naturally to all creatures great and small

Yodelling comes so naturally to creatures great and small that the combined cacophony drives you out of your tiny mind and your head explodes when you are surrounded by a horde of yodelling mosquitos.

I wish a masseuse would walk in the front door and offer me a shoulder rub

they do, but its a Yodelling mosquito masseuse and you come up in bites.

i wish i had a handle.

You do have a handle but it's the handle to a cauldron of evil flaming snake spirits and you are caught in an infinite realm of terror.

I wish the sun would come out all pretty on the weekend

The sun does come out but it burns everything!!

I wish I could hang-glide right now.

You hang-glide right now, but you're inside, so it doesn't last very long..

I wish I had a minature giraffe. About 50cm high.

you get your little giraffe but soon realize it's one of those sponges that gets bigger when it gets wet, it grows by more then 300% and gets gross wet slime stuff all over you.



I wish we could trade Marion for Shaq.

The trade occurs, but causes a basketball to explode in Shaq's hand, killing him.

I wish it was 5.

It is 5........Seconds away from the END OF THE UNIVERSE AAAAAAAGHHHHHH PANIC!!!!!!


I wish i knew all the laws of thermo dynamics

everybody now knows the laws of thermodynamics but completly forget eveything else about science.

I wish for a hemp like plant to be growing in my back yard

It appears, the police are not amused.
Your protest to the court that 'some weird girl in england made it growover the internet, honest!' convinces no-one, and you get a nice little padded cell of your very own to relax in for years.

I wish... my life was so amazingly fantasticly wonderful I didn't need to wish for anything.

Your life is so amazingly fantastically wonderful that you don;t need to wish for anything and you get so bored from lack of aspiration that you fall asleep and don;t wake up and miss all the good stuff.

I wish my liver would behave

it behaves but your ribcage revokes.

i wish i had another omelette

It behaves, but your other bodily organs rebel and start bullying it for being such a push-over. before you know it your heart's taking drugs, your lungs are using foul language, and your spleen is working alongside your kidneys into making your liver feel emotionally insecure.

I wish I could complete all these essays.

you compleate all of you essays one week after the final due date.

I wish that Skatto had answered FTAGs wish

*I liked Skatto's answer to my wish it made me laugh*

Skatto answered FTAG's question but in a inscrutable Zen like sideways manner caused by the ingestion of yet another cosmic omelette.
I wish my favorite reggae show was still on Sunday nights.

It is on sturday nights but you have to go to work due to a change in shift pattens and your VCR is broken

I wish I had plenty of exspendable income.