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Common Sense....the death of a friend

      
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#664569 - 02/12/05 10:45 PM Common Sense....the death of a friend
Mynci Offline
Macaque of all trades

Registered: 27/04/05
Loc: wombling free...
Didn't know if this should go in discussions or not but wanted to keep it light hearted so plonked it here.

I DID do a search but frankly puting "common sense" into the search engine pulled up - Contact staff (you know it's true people ) so thought best not to be too serious.

Please let me know your stories on un-common sense coz I got LOADS

The Sad Passing of Common Sense.
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has
been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was since his
birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as knowing
when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, life
isn't always fair, and maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more
than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not children, are
in charge).

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well intentioned but
overbearing regulations were set in place.

Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a
classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and
a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his
condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job
they themselves failed to do in disciplining their unruly children

It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent
to administer Panadol, sun lotion or a sticky plaster to a student; but,
could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to
have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became
contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better
treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar
in your own home and the burglar can sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to
realise that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her
lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his
wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is
survived by three stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else is to Blame,
and I'm A Victim.

Not many attended his funeral because so few realised he was gone.

If you still remember him, pass this on. If not join the majority and do
nothing.
_________________________
A couple of balls short of a full cascade... or maybe a few cards short of a deck... we'll see how this all fans out.

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#664570 - 02/12/05 11:24 PM Re: Common Sense....the death of a friend [Re: Mynci]
Sethis Offline
Pooh-Bah

Registered: 16/05/05
Loc: York University
I got a chain email with this, a few days ago...

Still funny, and really quite tragic.
_________________________
After much consideration, I find that the view is worth the asphyxiation.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I may disagree with what you have to say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it.

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#664571 - 03/12/05 03:15 AM Re: Common Sense....the death of a friend [Re: Sethis]
Mynci Offline
Macaque of all trades

Registered: 27/04/05
Loc: wombling free...
Yup. thought it better to share like this so I could see what people thought.
well sethis any lapses in commom sense? one of mine included:

tight-rope walking barbed wire...result = much blood

Home made death slide...result = a bruised face (and wicked ride )
_________________________
A couple of balls short of a full cascade... or maybe a few cards short of a deck... we'll see how this all fans out.

Top
#664572 - 03/12/05 03:43 AM Re: Common Sense....the death of a friend [Re: Mynci]
TinklePants Offline
Clique Infiltrator, Cunning Linguist and Master Debator

Registered: 03/07/05
Loc: Edinburgh burgh burrrrrr
*places flowers on the grave.*

No it cant end like this!

*digs up 6 foot of earth, opens coffin and puts cables on him via crocodile clips on his ears*

*tries to rescussitate Mr Sense*

10cc's of adrenaline, stat!

*1... 2... 3.... 4... 5.... breathe.... 1.... 2..... 3..... 4..... 5.... breathe*

*gathers a cauldron, candles, ouija board and herbs for a spell to bring him back to life*

IT CANT END LIKE THIS!!!
_________________________
I drive bus now?

I eat biscuits with my eyes.

I can walk through walls.

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#664573 - 03/12/05 04:09 AM Re: Common Sense....the death of a friend [Re: TinklePants]
[noodles] Offline
*Property of Pigeon Wigeon*

Registered: 31/07/05
Loc: Locked In Pigeons Chimney
*starts to cook a stew in tinks cauldren*
_________________________
Could somebody stop the room please... I'd like to get off

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#664574 - 03/12/05 04:44 AM Re: Common Sense....the death of a friend [Re: [noodles]]
TinklePants Offline
Clique Infiltrator, Cunning Linguist and Master Debator

Registered: 03/07/05
Loc: Edinburgh burgh burrrrrr
oi thats for mystic herbs, not carrots and tatties!
_________________________
I drive bus now?

I eat biscuits with my eyes.

I can walk through walls.

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#664575 - 03/12/05 12:29 PM Re: Common Sense....the death of a friend [Re: TinklePants]
Doc Lightning Offline
HOP Mad Doctor

Registered: 28/05/01
Loc: San Francisco, CA, USA
Written by: TinklePants


*1... 2... 3.... 4... 5.... breathe.... 1.... 2..... 3..... 4..... 5.... breathe*





Tink? It's 15:2. So you killed him.

INCOMPETENCE!!!!
_________________________
-Mike )'(
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella

"A buckuht 'n a hooze!" -Valura

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#664576 - 03/12/05 02:54 PM Re: Common Sense....the death of a friend [Re: Doc Lightning]
Rouge Dragon Offline
Insert Champagne Here

Registered: 21/07/03
Loc: without class distinction
_________________________
i would have changed ***** to phallus, and claire to petey Petey

Rougie: but that's what I'm doing here
Arnwyn: what letting me adjust myself in your room?..don't you dare quote that on HoP...

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#664577 - 03/12/05 11:25 PM Re: Common Sense....the death of a friend [Re: Doc Lightning]
TinklePants Offline
Clique Infiltrator, Cunning Linguist and Master Debator

Registered: 03/07/05
Loc: Edinburgh burgh burrrrrr
Written by: Doc Lightning


Written by: TinklePants


*1... 2... 3.... 4... 5.... breathe.... 1.... 2..... 3..... 4..... 5.... breathe*





Tink? It's 15:2. So you killed him.

INCOMPETENCE!!!!



But thats what they do in the films!
The films lie???!!
God now i feel so disenchanted. And there I was thinking that all the tales of happily ever after were true. Ok then, so why do I turn green when I get angry??? huh???

Plus he was dead anyway

God Now I need to talk to my shrink - Mike, do you know of any good ones?
_________________________
I drive bus now?

I eat biscuits with my eyes.

I can walk through walls.

Top
#664578 - 04/12/05 03:40 AM Re: Common Sense....the death of a friend [Re: Mynci]
Jublian Offline
member

Registered: 30/11/05
Loc: Melbourne, ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha
Written by: Mynci


Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to
realise that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her
lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.





Sorry this one's BS, and so are the whole stellar awards.

A solicitor my parents know informed me, to my embarrasment that he had researched for a case he was doing.
_________________________
"Quote coming soon..."

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#664579 - 04/12/05 08:50 AM Re: Common Sense....the death of a friend [Re: Jublian]
mykrme Offline
burning from inside

Registered: 13/05/05
Loc: anywhere but here
*snif snif*
_________________________
that's YOUR opinion... from fire we´re born, to fire we return...

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#664580 - 06/12/05 12:32 PM Re: Common Sense....the death of a friend [Re: mykrme]
Kyrian Offline
Dreamer

Registered: 15/03/02
Loc: York, England
Erm, no, if you read the news when it happened.....

but anyway, yes, good thread there mynci!

my own common sense went out the window when i had a sore throat and was talking to cute boys so wasn't watching how much i was drinking....
_________________________
Keep your dream alive Dreamin is still how the strong survive Shalom VeAhavah New Hampshire has a point....

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#664581 - 06/12/05 09:56 PM Re: Common Sense....the death of a friend [Re: Kyrian]
Lost83spy Offline
Out! Out! You demons of stupidity!

Registered: 14/09/05
Loc: Somewhere, out there...
Aah, common sense...

He will be missed
_________________________
It may be your sole purpose in life to serve as a warning to others Founder and Official leader of the Curby Clan *Owner of Brenn*

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#664582 - 07/12/05 08:37 AM Re: Common Sense....the death of a friend [Re: Lost83spy]
thegreatBJ Offline
Woman! Not gay Man!

Registered: 13/10/05
Loc: Hull...ish
common sense is more likely to be a she... based on the account that men have never had it
_________________________
I AM NOT A GAY MAN!

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#664583 - 07/12/05 08:55 AM Re: Common Sense....the death of a friend [Re: thegreatBJ]
Bubbles_ Offline
Carpal \'Tunnel

Registered: 25/11/04
Loc: mancunian
no comment!

what about common courtesy? not seen them for a while...
_________________________
Disclaimer:im not responsible for what i say or do whether it be before,during and after drinking alcoholic substances (owned by BMVC). Creater of Jenisms(TM) Virginity like bubble,one prick all gone.

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#664584 - 07/12/05 07:57 PM Re: Common Sense....the death of a friend [Re: thegreatBJ]
Lost83spy Offline
Out! Out! You demons of stupidity!

Registered: 14/09/05
Loc: Somewhere, out there...
Written by: thegreatBJ


common sense is more likely to be a she... based on the account that men have never had it






Good one!
_________________________
It may be your sole purpose in life to serve as a warning to others Founder and Official leader of the Curby Clan *Owner of Brenn*

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